Hmm..saded took back my IDA test le..so sad..i gt so low...
But expected le haha coz duno how to do..
At least pass can le ba..dun xpect too much :D

I easy contented de la haha...
haha lata thk taking back another test le..MMWD duno will how..
Knew it i'm a IT idiot haha..always flung my IT test..
Luckily i chose business haha..
hope i can do beta in the project and can pull up mu marks ba..

Now LG wif me at my clz haha..sitting beside me..
2day she bluff me wake up so early but in the end she no lesson..
Den hai me wake up so ealy..so tired nw haha
but so hapi coz my SP training cancelled liao haha can play myself haha
LAta go study aso..hope i can score well in teh ECM aso..

HAi so mani test so mani competition....Life is so stressed arz...
Maybe i shld juz take everything easy and dun xpect so much :D

Hai..everythign was juz not rite 4 me..
Basketball so sucky..i hate the word sucky but it muz be real sucky to make me use that word..

Bball use to be my fave but nw i felt so lost..
I may love it but it's not teh same old Jasmine that use to have so much passion 4 it..
Now i thk bball 2 me is too competitive den playing it becoz i love it..
Everything is different nw..So So So different...
I even felt that i have lost my own self..my normal self..
I even lost my mp3 nw..the ting tt i needed most and pei me through my sad time..
Its nw gone..Forever gone..even my mp3 wan leave me..
Everything is abandoning me..

My mp3 myself is leaving me...
I felt so lost...lost in myself...i'll try try to b normal..
But i felt so fake..so jia..
Hai..but being hapi will make every1 hapi den juz b it ba..
Its beta to b sad urself den making every1 sad wif u..
and i totally agree...
I felt so stress...so tired and so sian...
i JUZ FEEL LIke tAKING A BREAK FROM EVERYTHING..
I JUZ FEEL LIEK ENDING EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE NW..
Maybe i juz plain tired...
Mayb i care abt others too much..
This may show i juz can't be wat i wanna be when i go up..
Reali i shld juz gif up my dream as a social worker..
I'm juz nt cut to be one..

Maybe my frenz juz dun understand hw impt dey are to me..
Their joke may be joke to dem..
but sumtime i juz take it too hard...
I'm feeling tired..
Dun like to guess...
Knew they are joking but still sad coz i care...
I put frenz ist coz i believe frenz are 4eva..
Nw i dun even noe does my frenz noe dey are so impt
tt every ting dey say can affect my mood
everyppl...I REALI DO CARE ALOT...!!!!
But sumtime i'm reali tired...
Reali i sumtime juz feel liek heck care everything and dun go out..
juz be wif myself n myself..
But nw even my own self is lost..hu is dere...it left wif noone..
even my closest self leave me...
Even bball that i once loved is difted away from me...
I duno y juz duno y..
Wat have i become to?? i person that i dun understand and dun feel close to nw...
I reali feel liek crying all out..But i dun like to let ppl c my weak side..
Coz i have to be strong to take care of dem..
And y shld i cry out to let ppl noe..
It is juz betn my old self and my new self nw..

Everthing juz dun seem rite..
MAybe i juz tired..t..i.r..e...d....f.e...e..l.i...n...g...v...e...r...y.....t.i...r....e...d

Hmm today went to lesson..
my grp not a single person come for lesson..
den the teacher pass a remark..u so kelian arz..all ur grp member left u..
haha den luckily i manage to change our project den pass up lo..
Hope can pass ba..but i forgot to put in the appentix..saded...
nvm final project den put in lo :D..

After that eat lunch aso can't find the food that i wan..
When i put the food inside i juz dun have the hapi feeling.. haha
DEn go Beca hse..wow !! her hse very comfty lo..
haha dun feel like leaving lo..

But thk we too noisy le until jh headach..
Like very sad liek this den liek a baby like this eat medicine aso duwan..
haha..hmm like so long nv write le haha..

Then juz now actuali wan go gh hse..
den take 105 until TPY change bus 157 but..
waited for that irritating 157 until i got so irritated..
Very irritated...
Then i irritated until pia cab aso duno..
Istly i'm irritated..secondly i'm frastrated..Thirdly it is X

haha but noe i'm at home so hapi..wif zhang lang..
haha dun wu hui..zhang lang is my didi and is a human haha
haha listen to song now..all the song so nice..
Hope i can score well in Monday and Thur test :D
Jia you !! haha

hmm..haha juz finish one of the test MMWD..
Stupid test...duno can score nt haha but most prob cannt la..
Most of the thing cannt do lo..hope can pass can liao lo...
Den lata still got IDA test another one die one...
I duno is open book lo for MMWD and for IDA i noe but i 4gt bring the text...

I nice one hor i li hai hor..i aso thk so..
haha lata still got training duno shld sian or hapi haha
Feel like playing basketball but training like quite sian and tiring
Tonite go home still muz cheong SCM project..
Muz compile summore...

HAi! Hai! Hai!
We 15th sep den VS our ist team for woman's open le which is, Aljunied
One of the strongest team..How are we suppose to win??
Hmm lets pray hard and try our best..
You nv noe maybe luck is on our side haha

And i'm so hapi..my big brother finali tok to me le..
Joke wif me summore..haha so huan lian his lameness the pass few days..
and aso sad that he nv tok to me... haha
But now everything is over
YEAH!!
Back to normal le :D:D:D:D
*smilez* *smilez* *smilez* *smilez* *smilez* *smilez* *smilez**smilez*
and still *smilez* *smilez* *smilez* *smilez*
haha..gg to IDA test le..getting more and more jin zhang liao..hope can pass gd liao..
Always nv pin hope on IT stuff de haha
Business is always the best haha

Hmm..back home le..Today Training so tiring..still muz study..
Feel like slping le haha thk finish this den go slp le..

Idiot me..today come home realised..i send wrong sms to him, big bro..
I actuali send to my frenz..saded...
But i immediately send him one more sms and he din reply aso..
:( Maybe i anger him too much until he din even wish 2 look at me str8 and tok to me..

Todays trainign quite physical but not reali tough..
The tough has yet to come...Hope this yr i can perform well in IVP...Juz like Shao Nian Bei
haha now have beta relationship wif the teammates le..last time like duno duno each other...

Hai Lan Zhong is starting this Sunday..
I'm so scared..
We meet
Tanglin (small)
Aljunied(big)
Tampines East
KAi xuan..
Hope we can win....haha AND GET INTO NEXT ROUND..

although i'm nervous haha i will try to play my best :D

Jasmine ah gu jia you jia you!!!

hmm..today wake up so early xia..the Econs lo..
Haha i meet my frenz at clementi mac actuali wan eat de in the end i din eat..
Too early to eat ba..haha very tired arz.. lata still got training duno can make it not..

Hai he ytd sms Big bro he nv sms back..so sad..
Den morning i go econs we nv tok lo..
den during his presentation i look at his direction
den accidentely we see eyes to eys den immediately he look away.. :(
Den go eat he aso nv join us..

When he walk to sit wif us we aso nv tok..den he ask 'hus drink can drink'
I ans coz is my drink..but he juz look 4 1 sec and ans bro...
Hai... :( :( :( :(

But...BUt...BUt....During IDA he came ova to tok to me..abt our proj..
but he nv joke wif me..he juz tok abt project..hai sad...
Now lesson end le.. :D hai..hope everything will be alright...

Hai den dey leave le aso nv call me..hai...last time at least will ask me de..
Now ask aso nv den go le...hai..suan le ba...

Hmm..i was so sad today...As i stepped in my clz..
My clzmate scolded me in a very harsh tone..
He say i have HP for wat de..
Coz he called me for alot of time but i din pick up..
But i not purposely de..REali not purposely de...
I was having training or playing match at that time he sms me..i reali din did it on purpose :(

I was so sad when he shouted at me..
And feel even more guilty as he pass me my sun xie zhi M1 card
My fave card..thk wat my frenz was rite..
He may be angry coz by all means he help me take my fave card..
But not ansing his call was like so dun care..
NO wonder he is angry.. Hai all my fault... I'm so irresponsible..
Hope that he tok to me once again...

He was like a big brother to me..a bro that i look up too...
I miss his lameness and joke..but ytd he din even tok to me...
Hai...Hope we can be like last time again...

This few days happen so mani things...
Duno i can take it until wat limit..
All my frenz was liek so sad..and i tried my very best to console dem..
And Now..i have problem wif my frenz..
and further more is a big bro that i respected most..
Hai..hope everything will like sunshine after the rain..
A Beautiful rainbow will appear after all the rain have gone...!!

Hmm..bball is sumthing i took up in pri six..at tt time i was so silly..
it was oni in seconday tt i learn shooting and layup..
Duno when it becom my fave..
Until i will like die w/o it :D

Hmm My sec sch time was the best time..
The team was so close adn team spirit and work is dere..
The best team..Although our individual skills are not gd
We tried our best and i have the best memories with dem..

Next after my Os i went to AJC to try..
I enjoy my time dere and i got the bes expierence of Basketball Camp
The team are so close too..
things change when i took my Os result
Attitute of dem simply change..i felt so lost and unwanted...

Tts is the time i felt disappointed and say i'll nv step in AJC again...
But hu noes behind it i miss them so much..
I miss the team so much...
How i wish i can play for dem..
How i wish i was in the team...
Appreciate dem of giving me a jersey of my fave no 7..

And becoz of tt i went to Chong Ghee instead of T-net..
And becoz i went Chong Ghee there is alot of commotion..
There is like alot of dislikes..
But wat to do now i'll struck wif Chong Ghee and i love the team..
Coz dey let me feel a sense of belonging..

This yr i played for Chong Ghee for Shao nian bei..
We are called Chong Ghee Blue..
So happi we won throughout out..but JUz 1 match Xue lian white..
ALthough i played well tt match one of my best matches..
But i'm quite disappointed coz we have to face a stronger opponent...
XUE LIAN HONG...

Argh...That is the worst match i ever played..
B4 this match no1 wan to come for training...
I Went..and end up oni 4 players came..
YYY...and Rabbit was not there when we most needed her...
I played like shit..y coach still put me in...
How insulting is that to hear wat teh uncle say...
Why she playing..she liek duno how to play bball...
i was so stress up..i felt i wasn't helping the team at all...

Went off and tok to a cat..eben the cat dispise me..walk away fr me..
I was so depressed...i felt i was the cause of the lost...
I eat alot..juz eat..hope eating an help me 4gt everything...
But i was wrong..

In The end we end the shao nian bei with a third position..
but quite impress with our 3rd and 4th match coz we won dem by 60 ova..
After that came the Lan Zhong Bei again...
Each time my confidence is build up at Shao Nian Bei
it crash down to nth when it come to Lan Zhong...
Its the same last yr and all this repeat this yr again..

I lost all my confidence..i dun dare do anything..
I'm juz useless in the team..i felt i make no contribution to their victory..
BUt i juz add on to their mistakes..and make everythign worst...
I do not noe how to shoot..nor how to layup..everything juz disappear whrn i'm on court
I try to hide this feeling but i jzu can't...

Can anyone help me?? JUz Save me.. I juz wan to be my ownself..

i have so much to say...sosososo much like its always endless...
I finallyu noe wats the use of diary..to say thing that u cant find any frenz to say..
you do not wish anyone to noe..is all ur deep feeling..

Putting a strong front is nt easy..putting a smilez always is not easy..
It may look easy btu it's not..
Sumtime i juz feel like crying all out..n pour out to sumone..
But i juz find the right person..
I Found 1 and wan tok to her..but now she is ignoring me now.
Even she ignored me.. Who is there to care abt me...
WHO! WHO! WHO JUZ TELL ME WHO!

Today is juz a sucky say..a day that i'll nv forget...
I promise my most precious mei that today morning i wun be late in meeting her to study..
BUT i broke the promise..i broke the trust..
She was so upset..she was oready very upset the past few days...
IDIOT me add on to her sorrow...DO i worth to be her JIE?

I lied..i said i found my frenz..and pei my frenz so busstop
but i actual fact i went to the carpack alone..
To cry..!! i do not wish them to see that i'm sad..
Coz i noe i'm at fault and i've no reason to cry..
I'm Sori that i lied..

Sumtime i juz thk i'll always adding saddess to ppl...
I'm always the cause of ppl saddness!! y am i here den?
Sumtimes its reali hard to look after so mani ppl..
Ppl ard me is all so upset and it makes me upset to see ppl upset..
Cause they are all my frenz i care for dem..but sumtime i juz feel tired...
JUz Too tired to do anything, juz lost wat can i still do for them?

i noe i'm stupid..stupdi me still wan to be a social worker like this
Thk i can juz throw away my dream..i jzu sux!

i tok to her she din care abt me..Does she noe it makes me feel upset seeing her upset..
does she noe her every movement and additute means alot to me?
Does she noe i treasure her alot? Does she noe i need her..does she noe i appreciate her
Does she noe she is my most precious mei..and she will always be there for me..
Thus i aso wish i can always be there for her..to comfort her...to console her..
Does she noe i wan to share her sorrow? and every happiness i wish to share with her?

I juz sms her..she told me she is lost and ask me dun care abt her and go rest go slp..
Do u Thk i can? Do u thk i juz can go rest? NO!!
I'm lost too..lost in how can i appoarch her...
The way she ignore me the way she sms me..makes me sad..
I cried...coz i felt like i'm like gg to lose one mei?
like i all lost in a dark forest and i felt so helpless..

I was anxious and worried..and i felt so sad when she say she felt like so unwanted...
I noe in my heart i wan her i need her i treasure her n i love her..
I'm scared to lost my mei..
I hope she understand i reali care and i wan share my everything wif her..
Hope evrythign will be fine..
But i Will NV foget this very day..a DAY THAT WILL STAY IN MY MEMORIES FOR LIFE..

this day is juz like the time we have wif a frenz..i was so afraid that i'll lose a frenz..
Hope she will not feel so upset alwasy.. hope a day a sweet will make her smilea always...
i hope everyone ard me will be happi and i'll be contented..

Hmm..haha this is my first Blog..
See so many frenz hav den i aso go sign up lo..
haha fashion ma..
i also Duno what i wan write..juz write things that i think of lo..
This few days quite happy haha coz i enjoy playing wif frenz..
but aren't reali impress wif my prefomance in basketball..
i felt demoralised when i am on court..
Adults are like too strong for me 2 handle..
Know i'm Not Up to Standard for Lan zhong bei
Hope this year Chong Ghee will have achievement ba..
Juz pray hard..
Juz pray hard.. !!

I now 18 liao too old to play shao nian bei nxt year
This yr shao nian bei is my memory manz..
but we still lost to xue lian which i thk we shld win..
Hmm..I thk it will forever be a unforgettable
MEMORY!!
Haha..i tok to CAT Summore haha stupid lehz...