take it easy
*smilex*

Why tears kip rolling down?
DO u tears when ur happy...
I guess so...
Im ok...im happy.... i can take it
Should i tell myself all this??

I ask ppl to cheer up i should too isnt it?
Im supose to be ppl's sunshine..
BUt why y cant i shine like before??
Can anyone turn tis torch on?
Be ppl sunshine in the morning and moonlight in the nite

Looking through...thking through..
All the things all the memories...
-it came all back-
Yet i have to take it all...
fren..yupz..ya..frens 4va...

Yes!! everyone needs me..
Needs my attention....
Need my concern..
Need my care..

BUt have u all tot hu i need !!!!!

I need love..
I need care..
I need concern...
I need attention...

I hate to be alone..
I hate to be lonely...
I hate silent...
I hate nite...

-tears roll without control-
-i need my tears to be wipe away-
-i need a shoulder to lean on-
-i need a listening ear-
-yet i duno n dunwan to say-
-im in a mess-
-im going cray..being driven crazy-
-once again-

Guessaa..... every1 is upset....
N i haveta be strong huh....
Coz im the future counsellor..

Have i ..... hmm duno..
Have i say it at the wrong time?
How i wish....

Listening to the song..
Wo ai ni que gu yi,
gu yi shou wo bu ai ni
what a good sentence...

Ur sms make me think..
Ask me to think...
God can u gime more time...
Gime me one more chance

-hoping...dreaming...wishing-

Haha..finali after so long..
Im back to work..
My work place at hartford..
Was actuali very tired..so decided to finish blogging..
den go slp..My eyes gonna close le
ha and went home to watch the super star thingy...
But so sad my little shuai ge did badly..
he sang qte badly for the individual part...

den the num 3 M3 i thk..
I love his voice man..so nice..
Too bad tml cant watch teh ger one..but nvm.
I gonna watch in on sunday :) yay!
And sat gota work but nvm finish watching teh guy de liao..
haha ya..im gona mit my bed le...
haha dreamland here i come...

-The feeling of missing-
-or rather the missing feeling-

Missing someone is a terrible but at the same time, sweet feeling.
U will be sitting around wondering if u meant anything to him/her.
Thinking if he/she ever cares about u.
Rushing to the phone once it ringshoping that it'shim/her.
Looking out of the window hoping thathe/she will
surprise u by appearing downstairs.
Sitting in front of the television but
thinking ofher missing the final episode of your favourite show.
Laying on your bed, thinking of the last time u went out together.
Thinking of how nice it will be to sit
under the stars again, talking about everything,
yourdreams,plans, future.
Logging on to the internet hoping to seehim/her online.
When u realise that he/she isn't online
and did not return your page, u will start worrying ifhe/she isokay.
Missing someone is a way of growing up i guess.
It exposes u to loneliness.
It teaches u how to cope with being lonely
and let u know that there is actually a feeling known asemptiness.
Sometimes it feels good to miss someone.
U know that u really care and u indulge
in the feeling of loving/caring for him/her.
But missing someone and not knowing if
he/she isfeeling the same is terrible.
U feel as if u are being left alone.
So if u miss someone, tell him/her andlet them know.
However it is hard to do so...
At the same time, ask if they miss u.
Don't let the feeling of missing someone become jealousy or paranoid.
If u are the one being missed and u know it,
let the other party know.
if u miss him/her too, tell them.
Don't let them wait.

-Meaningful isnt it -

I understand..
I should understand...
I must understand....
It's time to understand..
I understood..

I dun wanna see my frenz sad..
So all of u plz smiles...
May it be tears of saddness...
Or tears of happiness...

I still wan u all to kip ur tears...
I wanna see ur teeth..
rather than a tap..
Ok..plz i beg u all k...
Dun cry le...
And all of u dun thk too much k...

Problems come n goes...
so..... Let it come n let it go..

u make me miss...
u make me think...
u make me harbour hope...
u make me love again...
u make me dream..
u make me lose control...
u make me lose myself...

Dun say u dun miss me...
Dun say u dun think of me..
Dun say i have no hope...
Dun say u dun love me...
Dun say wake up..
Dun say i should control...
Dun say i should not lose myself...

-all i wan is u-

Tis v day..AT the starting of tis day...
You make me cry..and at the ending i almost cried...
Will u rem tis v day...
Will me? Tell me u would plx...

Tears is wat i use to wash my face...

Hmm......................................................
Everynite....im waiting......
There's joy there's diappointment...
Can u plz bring me juz joy..
And nv diappointment!!

I dun wanna wake up..
tears clean my face..
I hate nite i hate silent..
Now i hate waking up...

*tears*

-Hurt-
Batuku on my forehead..
Got elbow den instant bum :(

-xi-
nvm though im injured but im hapi...
Thanx for ur concern..
I appreciate it n i love it manz...
k im mad..waha but seriously im..

-to u-
Im sorri ba..
And thanzk for buying teh sports bra for me..
Yay..i have it le..im so hapi...
than ahmei :)

u make me cry...

Once again tears roll down...
I wan it stop but i cant..
can u wipe it off...
And i wan to kip away...
BUt i cant..
I afraid of dark...
Afraid to be alone..
I wan u to hold me tite..
i wan u to walk me through...
Can u? once again? plz say u can...

N 4 u!
Im not worth it..
Im sori i hurt u deep..
But i juz cant atke it off my mind..
N tt u ask me why i cant ans too..
coz ive no ans as to why?
N reali thanz for being by my side...
Maybe i juz too selfish n so unappreciative...
I thk im juz too bad and dun deserve all u did..
All i can say its sori...
Hope u understand..Im juz too occupied..
Duno...maybe..

ARgh!!! Help me plz help me...
take me far....alone wif u juz alone wif u..

Feeling so cold..can u hug me?
Feeling so lost..can u lead me?
Feeling so unwanted..can u want me?
Feeling so not miss...can u miss me?
Feeling so sad..can u make me smile?
Feeing so happy..can u share my joy?
Feeling so empty..can u fill me up?
Feeling blue..can u give me happiness?
Feeling so unloved..can u love me?

Once again...
Can u hug me...
Can u lead me...
Can u want me..
Can u miss me..
Can u make me smile..
Can u share my joy..
Can you fill me up...
Can u gime happiness..
Can u love me..
Once again?

I miss the hugs..
I miss the leading...
I miss the wants...
i miss the Misses..
i miss the smile..
i miss the joy..
i miss the filling...
i miss the happiness
i miss the love

Waiting...Missing..
JuS FoR 1 ...sms..or regards..

Act dun intend to go out de..
Wanted to rot at home..
My fren all go sentosa...
So noon no program..
Den at nite duno got go eat wif mama not..
Act when my mum say no nd i duno lei..
Duno wan go watch nt..but stil i went..
To gif dem my support.yay!

Went to buy My Formal shirt today ...]
Went wif Connie n von
Dey so stupid la..
Thk gona wear in on tue ba :) yupz..
thk i gg back work again..
*bored* tired...Was so busy with proj..
My stupid ISP la...but nvm is ok...

Den went to watch Xiao diu match...
They played well ...
And they won..
ANd the Von wa...so lihai la..
got in teh last 2 bball :)..
Yupz kip up the gd work..
U all r still young ..yupz...
Enjoy ur youth..
I got to play youth cup when i was 17 oni...
But it leave me wif gd memories..
Yupz..foreva..

Memories will nv go away..
Regardles wat kind of memories..
Howeve sum memories juz remains..
U wan it go awaya it juz wun..
It juz stay...4eva...

love vs hate?
True vs untrue?
Truth vs lies?
want vs unwanted?
Reality vs Dream?
happy vs sad?
quiet vs noisy?
hide vs show?
proactive vs reactive?
Cry vs smile?
Admit vs escape?

Life is juz lyk tis....

*i miss my swing*
* i miss............ ya*

Juz came back from running..today reach hm v early..
den suddenly headach so wenta rest awhile.
but hu noes i juz lie on bed and i wake up its 830 le..
i lie on bed @ ard 6 lo..

den watch the super star thign of channel U..
After tt 930 went down to run...
den i ran all teh way to upper peya lebar..
So shiok...ist tym run so far..
Den kip on sweat..so shuang...
So long nv run le..
n as the wind beat against u..
It lyk taking away all ur prob and everything..

After tt finish runing le i run to the swing dere..
My recently visited place...
I wenta play..it seem to all come back..
Memories still remains....

i hate nite..
I hate slient..
WHen it come to nite..
It seem so silent...

And i start it all ova again..

ACt dun intend to go sch...
But in the end i dreamt of sumthing...
Sumthing im so sad n scared..
Seem lyk she want 2 b gone 4eva....

I dunwan too...Fear sink in....
Heart beat faster..

I dreamt of her...
And as i was walking..
The more i call her the faster she run..
And she seems to be running away from me..
It seem so distant...
Im so affected..

Hai even by a dream?

Thk im giving u saddness...
As u said, i cant gif u happines.
Im sori...
Im not strong at all!!

I wan more....
I wan more than a sms...

Yes im sunshine n moonlite..
tis is wat i once said 2 sum1...
But y i cant be now..
Maybe its juz 4 tt sum1...

Wat Am i Doing?
Wat Am i Waiting?
An Explaination? An Ans?

Cries.

I dunwan to thk..but yet i cant stopped myself from thking...
I affected but yet ive 2 show im not...
I wan to look but yet ive 2 show tt i didnt wan 2..

Can tym turn back..can u juz reverse the tyms...

-Speechless-if its easy-if i can-
-truth is all i wan-maybe i dun understand-mayb i nv did-

I'll never know whatthe future brings
But I know you're here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife?

I don't know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I pray in you're the one I build my home with
I hope I love you all my life

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right
And though I can't be with you tonightYou know my heart is by your side
I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am
Is there any way that I could stay in your arms

got to noe even more...
I told myself nt 2 be affected..
But am i..
ppl ask ed am i reali happi..
But am i?
Wahaha i duno.....

i duno u..
coz it seems lyk wat u wan doesnt reali seems wat u reali wan..
nv tried to show..
-speechless-

Can anyone bring me happiness....
Can anyone stop the tears.....

stil rem wat u send me b4.u said u wan me to belief u...
U dun care wat others thing n bcoz of tis i belief u...
n i have all reasons to assume...
All reasons to thk the way...
Yes u can be pissed coz u thk itsn't the way im thking...
But thk back y..y do i thk tis way...
And didnt i ask u ist..
Hoping u'll tell me the truth...
But u said nth when i knew it...

It hurts hearing from others i duwan to belief wat others said..
But i see it for myself...
The day when u knelt down ask her go fisherman village...
The day when i mit huizhi n she mit ah bun...
But u said i mit huizhi oready so mit for wat...
But yet u went to mit her when she mit ahbun?
N u intiate to ask her mit u summore..so u dun take intiative?
N tt she's the apple of ur eyes....

I nv said is ur fault i nv say im blaming u....
But jzu to say ive reason to asuume n
in the end will jump 2 conclusion when u nv tried 2 xplain...

Knowing tt the day u cried at the home-united match is becoz of her?
Actuali it kips me wonder..
Do any song make u thk of me?
Will u kip all the song tt i lyk n love listening to it...
Will u wan to sms me when i dun sms u...
Do u reali love me so much as u said...
Maybe u did..but it will be in the past n nv again?

THk of it if u were in my position...
How will u feel....How hurt will it be...
I duno wat am i holding on when fact is tt u duwan anything....
N if its easy to forget n let go..world will be beautiful...
n i wun be so xinku...
U always said my actions dun speaks for my words...
Den do u..reading the sms u sent me....
IT hurt deep k..n reali deep can....

Thank for saying u love me!!

Having lesson now..communication skills in business...
Abit boring but still ok ba...
Thk i die le..i haven start on my proposal of my independent study project..

Den my exam all coming up...
Sian...got work to do la...
fading away...flying away....

Hai..tired..tired of everything..
everything seem so distant..
I duno yes i may seem to have everything..
I may seem to be happy n contented..
which i should..
But y...y did my love seem so distant....
Y did God want to take away all my love..

First my knee nxt my back...
Hope it will juz recover..
But its of no use..coz im juz a lousy player la..
In ppl eyes?i juz chiong?n have no brain in playing bball??
Maybe its true ive no brain...
aybe staying in ajc i will learn lost more..
My life will eb different.
Totally different i belief....n i wun get injured ba...

N Yes..im so pro..Pissed ppl on court...
Block not oni ahbin ways on court.but cheryl n juli's way aso..
N they r nice enuff nt to flared up @ me...
I shld be happi la...
Thk tt day i belong to toa payoh rather den chong ghee..
And my last match sux....
Wat 3 3 pts target..all bullshit..
i cant even get in a simple underbasket...
Wat is dere to say abt 3 pts..i thk too highly of myself
Hey jasmine lee shu fen..wake up from ur dream land..
Once again wake up..ur juz have a minor position in everything..

Seem to have drifted from everything..
Maybe juz take me to a remote place..
i deserve to be alone..
To be throw in one remote place n zhi bi la..
I shld be alone..
JUZ LEAVE ME ALONE!!

Confused.breaking down..
everything seem so packed..matches exam tutorial..
Lessons..friends...stop pressuring me..
Serious speaking i duno wat i wan...
Maybe i shld juz go slp n nv wake up la..

Wonder will ppl mis me...
or its juz a lost of any frenz..
Getting feelingless....meaningless..lifeless.....colorless
SPEECHLESS!!

Yeah ist tym i wear my green green shoe...
So tired wake up qte early 2day..
duno 4 wat aso....cant slp
Den mit huizhi go pasir ris park..
wahaha go till so far la..
den we went shopping...

Went suntec shopping...shop till 2 hapi..
i forgot my purpose of gg dere...
Went 2 find bro...den wenta eat...
And i was so upset..
my fave green tanktop @ topshop is gone..
Dun have my side :( and fox aso dun have another tanktop i wan :(
I wait for my pay but my clothes nv wait 4 me :(

Afetr tt went town mit jh n lala go match..
Hey lala sori..u shld noe i apologise for wat ba..
Yupz bu shi gu yi de n its not abt u :)
Still will go town find u de wor.coz i need to research :)
den i wan my cookies n cream..
eee....so fattening but stil its my love

Den went watch xiaodiu match...
At ist it was suchta close match...
In the end thk no strength le tts y...
Den after tt take cab rush down lor ahsoo..
cool xia dey trash the team lyk siao..
haha den we lyk so noisy la....
and after tt play bball til v shiok manz..

Den wenta eat.hapi man..though share wif guan hong..
but i play bball til abit tired lo..
Thk of tml gg sentosa..tired..
And my room is nt pack yet la...and i haven study...
My exam is cuming stress manz...nxt week thk study le..
work lesser i thk..make myself busy...
It may be betta..thk its gd.. ok...
I muz be busy...coz im a busy ger..

Tml final match..so scared but thk will win??
Hope so n tml my target 3 3 pts :)
waha hope can lo..mayb im dreaming la
n pray tanglin will win paling n yeah we will b 2nd again :)
N it may be teh alst 2nd placing we will get as a team..
as the chong ghee tt i once get in..i guess..

Silly boi...i nv say ur silly..
Coz i understand...
but y after so long u came back to tell me all tis...
Im not worth it la i dun deserve all tis la
maybe by telling me its ok...
But u went on asking me..
THough u gime tym
u ask me for an ans..

Act i know the ans..its ok to have other in ur hrt
but u muz be sure that u will love the other person
more than the person in ur hrt..

i thk im juz silly..
facts is in front of me facing me...
Im juz being stupid...
i shall not be stupid anymore..
Hey hey..cow ahgu jasmine lee shu fen WAKE UP!!

YES YES! im wide awake..
Im not in my dreamland anymore...
I still wan go back to slp..*beat myself*
Nth in lala land n i shld stay awake...
Yes indeed as she said open my eyes n see...
The day when i knew she the 1 tt she wanted to mit rather den me...
I knew it i shld understand completely...
She have higher piority den me...
Im juz nth...
U say u dun take iniative..thk abt it urself..
U take intiative to sms ppl ist n mit ppl..
N not tt i nv ask u n she miting other ppl too..
So wats me miting otehr ppl different from ehr miting other ppl..
Admit it la..its not i wan belief other ppl its i c it all by myself.
So wats ur excuse now..
I understand it all completely
Why dun u tell me..u may thk telling em will hurt me..
But thk dun ur actions hurt me too..
It hurt me even more can than u urself telling me..

And i thk niang is rite...
Me myself noe wat i wan can le..

wats more do i wan..wats more do i need...
I should be contented